Things I Will Never Understand

As my four year stint at BYU comes to and end, I am left with a few things that still boggle my mind.

Pink for Guys- Now, I understand that originally pink polos were popular because it was showing everybody that you were secure in your manliness, kind of like being cool with giving a guy friend a hug. But like many fads, things quickly degraded. It was not long before life was like a scene from a very pink horror story. Pink belts, pink backpacks, pink shoes, and yes, even pink pants for guys were to be seen. I was glad when the pinkification of men’s apparel slowly faded, but I am still amazed (read appalled) when I see some people clinging desperately to their pinkness. Big weightlifters wearing pink somehow seems more o.k than emo kids wearing pink. (I was going to say scrawny emo kids, but that seems a bit redundant)

Shirts that say things like “I pooed” – Do I really need to explain why this is confusing? Unless this is some sort of major achievement, then why announce it to the world? Wait, even if it is a big accomplishment, I don’t want to hear about it. I’m not against humorous shirts; there are a lot of shirts that say weird and funny stuff, but then there are these types of shirts. I am sure you know what I mean. Maybe these people are trying to seem “unique” at a very conformist BYU, but… if pooing is what makes them unique… I dunno about that.

PDAs – And I don’t mean personal digital assistants. I am not even going to bother with the cliche “go get a room” response here, because, let’s face it they can’t. I also want to make it very clear that I am not talking about a peck on the cheek from your significant other before you head to class. I am talking about full-on making out in the quad. Why do people do it? If theyreally need to reach their daytime make out quota, then why don’t they go somewhere secluded on campus? Don’t they know that the art garden is WAY less trafficked than the middle of campus? There is a time and place for everything, and the middle of the walkway in the middle of campus in the middle of the day is not the time OR place for making out. Oh, and get a room.

Mustaches – I get it, these guys don’t like the honor code, but they have to keep it. And I think we all know that people can get away with having a mustache at BYU. But, people need to realize that there are several types of mustaches. Not all of them are created equal. Some people look dignified with a neatly trimmed mustache, while others look like they need to be locked away. Very far away. If someone really must have a mustache, then please keep it tidy.

HFAC people – The HFAC is the Fine Arts College at BYU. I admire the artwork that students are allowed to post, and I enjoy BYU’s many performances which occur in the center (maybe not so much for the modern dance routines). But you have to admit, there are some weird people in there. I am glad that these people are really “into the art” or whatever, but when they walk by me playing air guitar, and singing along at the top of their lungs to whatever rock opera they are listening to on your iPod, well… it kind of creeps me out.

I could go on for a while longer, but really, there could probably be an entire blog about BYU oddities.