Similar
Posted: February 25, 2013 Filed under: Dangerous Book for Boys, War and Peace 4 CommentsUntil recently, I didn’t really understand when people said, “So-and-so and I are just alike. That’s why we never get along.” Then there was Evan.
It’s horrifying to see all my flaws and weaknesses mimicked and thrown back at me by a four-year-old. Beyond that, it’s aggravating. I know I’m to blame for a lot of Evan’s bad habits and unpleasant behavior. I have a short temper; Evan escalates just as quickly, and within minutes we’re both furious. He shouts that he’s not my friend anymore and I mutter that I don’t care as I stomp off to lock myself in the bathroom for a brief moment of privacy.
Parenting is hard. And lately I feel like I’m doing it all wrong.
I have been making an enormous effort this past week to stay calm and patient when Evan is being his normal belligerent self. It’s exhausting! I’m crossing my fingers that persistent effort will pay off eventually, but for now I still have a surly kid on my hands. I think Jarom is both amused and frustrated by how similar Evan and I are.
Today was Evan’s checkup, and we always do ice cream afterwards. Because his appointment was at lunchtime I decided to use a little of my spending money to get Happy Meals for the kids and let them play for a while at the play area, with the condition that they could only open the toys when we left – and only if they left without fussing. When Evan went to go play, he told me, “If you call me, I will come with no fussing because I’m a good listener.” We’ll see if that actually happens. I’ve been trying to praise more than correct, which I hope will help mini-me be a little nicer in turn.
Any other advice? I’m struggling mightily!
Loved
Posted: February 13, 2013 Filed under: Brothers Karamazov 2 CommentsI haven’t really ever had to deal with losing a loved one. My mom’s dad died when she was a little girl, and my dad’s mom passed away when I was just a little too young to feel sad about the abstract concept of death. The first time I remember being impacted by a death was when my bishop passed away when I was 16. I was impressed by how upbeat his family was at his funeral – they’d known he was going to die soon, and their faith gave them perspective. Since then, I’ve only been to two other funerals – one for our stake patriarch, whose wife had passed away many years before, and who everyone felt was ready to go; and one for my aunt, who’d had a long battle with cancer. I remember that occasion as being sacred and reverent. Every aspect of it was carried out with deep respect and love.
Jarom’s grandmother passed away yesterday. She had been in poor health for the past year and hospitalized recently, but her condition had been improving, so this was sudden and unexpected and heartbreaking. His grandparents had been married over 60 years, and I can’t imagine how his grandfather is feeling now. It’s been hard for everyone, with so many prayers in her behalf and great hopes that she was on the mend. I’m glad we all got to visit over Thanksgiving, and have that memory.
We’ll be heading down to the funeral soon – I don’t know the exact date yet – so there may not be regular posts for a few days.
Have you had to deal with this kind of loss? What would you suggest that I do to help Jarom and his family out?
Evan on Superheroes
Posted: February 7, 2013 Filed under: Dangerous Book for Boys Leave a commentThis week, Evan talks about superheroes, a red octopus, and dinosaurs!
Jarom
Mika
hilleries 