the saga begins.

I haven’t got the time or energy lately to sit down with a real journal. most of my days are spent in front of a computer now, anyway; I figure at least now I’m keeping track of my life online. and I feel like being quasi-anonymous for a while. I can suppress the english major within me, ignoring all the rules I know about grammar and punctuation. …actually, all I’m doing so far is not capitalizing the beginning of sentences, but trust me — it’s a big step.

tomorrow will be crazy at work. the girls will be back from the san luis job, and I think mick wants me to give liz and patricia something to do. I’m not sure if amanda will be here or down at pacific again. if she’s staying at the office, I’ll have her start indexing the pec stuff that heather ruined. liz should have plenty of her own work to do. I need to get the rescans from pacific incorporated, but I can’t really have someone else do that. it will be interesting, to say the least. I have an idea how to do this though.

here are my thoughts on all the employees and managers at mha:

adam – I can’t quite figure him out. mick says he’s learning a lot and doing much better as production manager down at pscu. it was insightful, though, to happen to see his notebook while we were in a meeting last week. perhaps I shouldn’t have, but he was sitting across from me and it was open to his list of new year’s resolutions. they were good resolutions, and I hope he keeps up with them. probably two of the reasons I’ve never really warmed up to adam are (1) he’s turned his back on the church and (2) he has an illegitimate daughter. those go so much against two of my strongest convictions that I’m having a hard time not holding it against him. I know it’s incredibly judgmental of me, and now that I’ve quantified it, I’ll work on stopping.

amanda – she’s known mick for ages, and he trusts her; she’s apparently done really well down at pscu, although she was just on qc. I can have her index pacific redout bins because she understands the job. I could also have her work on pec, because I need it finished way sooner. I don’t know amanda at all, since she was hired on for the pscu job and was only in the office for about 20 minutes every morning. but if mick is right about her (and he usually is right), she’ll be good help for me.

daryll – I think they picked the right person to move into liz’s position with qc, and to also take over bernard’s sales position. daryll is confident, organized, and always follows through. he’s been so good about giving me details, and checking in with information that is important from a data handling point of view. I don’t really have any connection with him on a social basis, but I’ll probably get to know him better in these coming months as we work closely together.

diana – I’ve only met her once, but she’s way high on lauren’s good list.

heather – not a good employee; I know we aren’t going to keep her, and I think I’m going to be the one who lets her go. that’ll be new. she really messed up on this pec indexing, and while I realize that I gave her plenty of instructions (both written and oral), I’m still afraid that it was a shortcoming on my part that made her misunderstand the project. now I have to completely redo all the work she did — granted, it’s only 26k images, but I was hoping to have this completed and ready for billing by tomorrow afternoon. now it doesn’t seem so likely.

irma – when she first started working at mha, she knew absolutely nothing about computers. she’s come so far since then. even though she isn’t entirely comfortable with everything, she can keep up with the expected hourly scanning rates. plus she does really good work with prep. she’ll probably do the entire batch 04 prep for pec herself. irma and I had a fun chat on friday during lunch. I like her. she’s about ten years younger than mom, but it’s interesting how age doesn’t really seem to matter with a lot of us at work.

kristina – very little interaction with kristina. she tends to go through mick jr. instead of coming directly to lauren or me.

lauren – she’s been so good at training me. every time I had a question this past week she’d walk me through it over the phone; she called to check up on me several times, and was very helpful. her confidence in me has been tremendously encouraging. in fact I don’t think I have any complaints about lauren.

liz – not really under my command. I don’t know what she’ll be doing now that daryll is taking over qc. if she’s free, though, I can put her on indexing either pscu or pec. liz isn’t much older than me — only about 6 months, I think — but she’s so much more confident and outgoing that I tend to think of her as being 24 or 25. I do like her, though, and I guess I’m just intimidated by her.

matt – lots of experience with scanning. the problem is usually that he forgets one or two important settings… like scanning images as bmps instead of tifs, or naming erros. they’re fixable, of course, but it’s time-consuming. matt was planning to propose to his girlfriend yesterday, so he should announce his engagement at work tomorrow. that means he’ll only be working with us until the end of the semester. he (unintentionally, I’m sure) helps me realize my inadeqacies by asking questions that I have no answers to. this past week while I assumed the role of production manager, he was scanning el dorado dot; I’ve never made so many quick and uninformed decisions in my life as I did with that project. he kept coming in with folders that didn’t have permit #s or that had four permit #s, wanting to know how he should name the files. I hope I didn’t give him answers that will cause me a lot of grief in the next two weeks. (or ever.)

matti – it’s so weird being in charge of someone from my ward. and who’s a generation older than me. I have to admit, though, that he’s done a stellar job so far. I gave him a target hourly rate and he exceeded it, and I’m very impressed. I’ll probably keep him on indexing for as long as I can. he asks a lot of questions, which is good, except that most of them have to do with certain levels of incompetency on his part. he doesn’t really look at the full file name and location, he just makes assumptions based off a quick glance. oh well. he’ll learn.

mick jr – it will be extremely strange to be on an “equal” level with him as a manager. he’s the one who hired me back in may. apparently he’s changed a lot since then; it will be interesting to see how he adjusts to married life. mick is quite a character, but has a few more points in his favor than against.

mike – big no. he seems to be a decent employee, but I dislike him very much as a person. why? good question. perhaps because he always smells like he’s been using drugs of some sort. (c’mon, I have no experience distinguishing between what different illegal drugs smell like!) I honestly don’t think he’ll do well with indexing, so I’d like to put him on the sample stuff I picked up from chris fisher on saturday. if he’s in the office tomorrow, that is. adam will probably keep him down at pscu until they’re finished, though.

mindy – never met. lauren trusts her, but then again, I trust my mom, too…

patricia – I’d feel completely awkward giving her work to do, since she’s been working at mha for so much longer than I have. that’s a big problem I have with this new position — I don’t feel like I really have the authority to be managing people like veronica and patricia and soli. that’s probably compounded by the fact that none of the people I most definitely have authority over (think matti) go to lauren when they have a question. I’m the manager, people, I’m the manager! I’m in charge of you! oh well. so that’s the deal with patricia. she’s changed a lot since this summer; all of a sudden she started wearing fishnet stockings and knee-high boots and skirts so short they hardly count as clothes. and everything is always black. I haven’t yet figured it out. maybe she’s trying to not seem as old as she is — and I don’t mean that 30 is old at all, it’s just that she has 3 kids, and she acts more like a teenager than an adult who has children. hmm. beats me.

sean – I’ve felt stupid around him ever since the mixup with whether he was going to pscu or not. it was my very first day being data manager without lauren around to help, and I had been told sean would be staying in the office and I could use him for indexing; but no one told sean. technically I could have told him then “you’re staying here today,” but like I said, it was my first day, and I didn’t have the confidence to do that. it was kinda embarrassing, just because all the other pscu folks were standing around when I asked, and I looked awfully incompetent. I’ve post-prepped his pec work, and it was pretty good, but I don’t know about anything else. I’ve never worked with him on any other jobs.

soli – somehow he makes me feel a little more comfortable with my new position. he’s one of the most experienced employees we have, but maybe he isn’t enough of a leader to be a manager. I can’t say that I entirely like soli as a person. he’s good to have at mha, though, and I can put him on just about any job I need him for.

teresa – one of the best indexers we have. I’m sorry to lose her for a while, but hey, if I was about to have a baby, I can’t say that I’d be feeling too bad about having to stop indexing. teresa is really good about keeping in touch and giving me updates.

veronica – she became a production manager while I was in utah. and she’s definitely competent. as I was talking with mick on friday he said there’s a language barrier problem with both veronica and irma that is holding them back from further positions in the company. I think that’s bull. veronica is just lacking confidence; she speaks english fluently, and I don’t know where she comes off saying that language is a problem. irma has never acted like it’s an issue. anyway, aside from that, veronica is a good manager. sometimes she and I will have a long conversation about all sorts of random stuff, but for the most part we’re both pretty reserved. I’m glad she and irma are good friends, or else they might both be silent at work.

then there’s andy, and tim, and mick; oh, and gloria. but they seem to me to be on another level of the hierarchy, so I won’t go into any detail about them. besides, I have to leave some observations for another day.

I ought to get to bed, but I’d like to talk to ryan before then. and he may not call for another hour. of course, he may not call at all, but chances are he will.

I wish jarom were coming home sooner. well, at the moment I do. tomorrow I may be glad it’s still another 4 months. to tell you the truth I’m superbly nervous about seeing him again, after so long. but I think things will go well… hope so…

more later.


Reading List for a Lifetime

Compiled by Arthur Henry King. Taken from Arm the Children. Names following the title are recommended translators or editors.

The standard works
Homer, The Iliad (Richmond A. Lattimore)
The Odyssey (Emile V. Rieu)
The Bhagavad-Gita (Christopher Isherwood)
Aeschylus, Aeschylus I—Oresteia (Richmond A. Lattimore)
Sophocles, The Oedipus Cycle (Dudley Fitts, Robert Fitzgerald)
Plato, Phaedo
The Republic
Euripedes, Euripedes One (Richmond A. Lattimore)
Herodotus, The Persian Wars (George Rawlinson)
Virgil, The Aeneid (John Dryden or Robert Fitzgerald)
Livy, The Early History of Rome
Josephus, The Jewish War
Plutarch, Lives of the Noble Greeks and Romans
Lives of the Noble Romans (ed. Edmund Fuller)
Eusebius, The Essential Eusebius
Augustine, The City of God
Bede, The Ecclesiastical History of the English People
Dante, The Divine Comedy (John D. Sinclair or Dorothy L. Sayers)
Geoffrey Chaucer, The Canterbury Tales (Nevill Coghill)
Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince
William Shakespeare, Hamlet
Othello
Measure for Measure
King Lear
Macbeth
Antony and Cleopatra
Coriolanus
The Winter’s Tale
The Tempest
Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote (Walter Starkie)
René Descartes, Discourse on Method (Wollaston)
John Milton, Paradise Lost
Paradise Regained
Samson Agonistes
George Fox, Journal (ed. Rufus M. Jones)
John Bunyan, The Pilgrim’s Progress
Jean Baptiste Racine, Athaliah
Phaedra
Molière, Tartuffe
The Would-Be Gentleman
The Precious Damsels
The Misanthrope (Morris Bishop or Kenneth Muir)
Jonathan Swift, Gulliver’s Travels
Antoine Prévost, Manon Lescaut
Samuel Richardson, Pamela (Part I)
Clarissa
Montesquieu, The Spirit of the Laws (Thomas Nugent)
Voltaire, Candide
James Boswell, Life of Samuel Johnson
Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Émile
Adam Smith, The Wealth of Nations
Edward Gibbon, The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire
John Wollman, Journal
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Faust I, II (Walter Kaufmann or Charles E. Passage)
Wilhelm Meister
William Wordsworth, The Prelude (Books I & II)
John Jay, Alexander Hamilton, and James Madison, The Federalist Papers (ed. A. Hacker)
John Keats, Letters (ed. Robert Gittings)
Jane Austen, Persuasion
Emma
Sendhal, The Red and the Black
Søren Kierkegaard, Fear and Trembling
The Sickness unto Death (Walter Lowrie)
Honoré de Balzac, Eugenie Grandet
Karl Marx, Early Writings
Henry David Thoreau, Walden
Civil Disobedience
Parley P. Pratt, Autobiography
Charles Dickens, Little Dorrit
Great Expectations
George Eliot, Middlemarch
Daniel Deronda
Gustave Flaubert, A Sentimental Education (Robert Baldick)
Fedor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov
Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace (Rosemary Edmonds)
Anna Karenina
Sarah Orne Jewett, Country of the Painted Firs and Other Stories
William James, The Varieties of Religious Experience
Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, Thus Spake Zarathustra (Walter Kaufmann)
Henrik Ibsen, Peer Gynt (Michael Meyer)
Rosmersholm
Ghosts
Hedda Gabler
Thomas Hardy, The Mayor of Casterbridge
Henry James, The Ambassadors
What Maisie Knew
Anton Chekhov, The Cherry Orchard
The Seagull
Uncle Vanya
The Three Sisters (David Magarshack)
Joseph Conrad, Nostromo
James Joyce, A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Sigmund Freud, The Interpretation of Dreams (James Strachey)
Thomas Mann, The Magic Mountain
Joseph and His Brothers
Marcel Proust, Swann’s Way (C.K. Scott Moncrieff)
John Maynard Keynes, The Economic Consequences of Peace
D.H. Lawrence, Women in Love
E.M. Forster, A Passage to India
Franz Kafka, The Trial
Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf
The Glass Bead Game (chapter 7)
George Santayana, The Last Puritan
Montaigne, Essays (John Florio)


2004 Year in Review

JANUARY. Back in Provo, I met Ammon Hepworth, a friend of Nate and Jjulia’s who had recently returned from a mission. Sarah my Nemelka called me one evening to say that Brandon had just proposed. School started and I enjoyed my classes: Hist 400 (Family and Law in American History), Hist 378 (History of the American Family), Hum 202 (Arts in Western Culture), RelC 261 (Introduction to LDS Family History), and Hist 421 (England Language Handwriting and Documents). The first round of tests went well, and I got above 90% in all subjects. Family history was, as you can see, my main focus and passion; I made a lot of discoveries and met a lot of new people because of it. Ammon helped me build my first snowman; he taught me how to tie my shoes; and he took me on a thoroughly enjoyable lunch date. While cooking dinner one night I turned on the wrong burner, and melted a spatula. Despite what seemed to be developing with Ammon (we even had a DTR—Ammon started it), I began falling in love with Jarom.

FEBRUARY. Ryan came back from Australia! At his request I found an apartment for him, which turned out to be a great place. Jarom sent me a Valentine’s Day letter, mostly in Korean. I took a road trip to San Diego with Julia, Nate, Ammon, Tracy, and Julia’s roommates; it was incredibly fun, although Sunday night I got quite a fever. After returning to Provo my condition worsened, and I soon figured out I had the flu. It turned into bronchitis. Just when I thought things were clearing up, I was brilliant enough to hyperventilate … though I didn’t realize that’s what I was doing. We all kind of panicked at the time, and Julia and Kim took me to the emergency room. The doctor gave me a paper bag to breathe into.

MARCH. Whether it was my waning interest in family history or something else altogether, I decided to switch to an English major. Now I realize that’s where I should have been all along. The weather was gorgeous for a lot of March, and Nate let me borrow his sister’s bike. We went on several lovely rides. Ryan and I started plotting how to take over the world, he made his famous steaks for me, and he and Stephanie and I wrote the first edition of The Fresco Daily Report. After the New Year’s Eve incident had made enough stir, I had my hair bleached. The stylist also gave me highlights and lowlights, thus entering a new term into my vocabulary. Lowlights? I didn’t know. One of my cousins was going through the temple, so I went with some other relatives to be there for the weekend in Twin Falls. Nate and I went to a Peter Brineholt concert with Kim and Tracy for Preference.

APRIL. Kim’s cousin Alicia invited us to go marshmallow slingshotting with her friend Paul. He said that it worked better if the marshmallows weren’t fresh—but he had let them dry out for several weeks, and they shattered when you fired them at the ground. It led to some welts and long-lasting bruises. Another nephew was born: David Brian Lewis. Ryan became my official storyteller, entertaining me for hours. I spent Easter at my aunt’s house in Salt Lake. My cousin Jennifer came to visit BYU with some of her friends who planned on attending the following fall semester; it was great fun to get to know her a bit, and I looked forward to spending time with her once she moved to Provo. My dad drove out to Utah at the end of the month, and, like always, we went back to California together.

MAY. I started working full-time (right away) at MHA Associates, a digital imaging company here in Fairfield. The hours were rough: the workday began at 6am. Since it wasn’t too far away, and I didn’t have a car, I got a nice red bike (with a basket) to ride to and from work. Being at home, where there were so many pieces of the past I had with Jarom, I was full of regret for the way I had handled things. And full of tenderhearted feelings towards him. Other than sending off his one-year package, I have no idea what else happened.

JUNE. I went to visit Brother and Sister Hillery. It wasn’t a bad visit, but I left feeling somewhat less than optimistic about a relationship developing between Jarom and me. Ryan and I spent hours (literally) talking on the phone, at all hours of the day. We started writing the Falconer tangent story (it’s my turn right now), which tests my writing skills to the limit. It is, however, one of the most fun things I’ve ever done in terms of writing. My brother Geoffrey found out that he might get a position as a teacher at the Defense Language Institute in Monterey. Kimberlee and I planned a trip for me to come visit her in July.

JULY. Well, I said we planned it, and lo and behold, it happened. I spent a week with Kim in Tennessee, and we did a lot of fun stuff. The humidity, though! Definitely a different way of living altogether. Nothing much exciting happened for my birthday. Kimberlee bought me a pair of genuine cowboy boots and Ryan wrote a perfectly lovely story for me. He also offered to fly out to California at the end of August so i wouldn’t have to drive back to Utah alone. Sarah finally accepted Brandon’s proposal, and they set their wedding date for October.

AUGUST. Finally bought a car! A 1991 Dodge Shadow, turquoise, name of Gabe. Trying to fit all my stuff in it was a challenge. Ryan and I had a fairly safe drive to Utah, if you ignore the fact that I got pulled over in Nevada. Oops. I spent a few days in Salt Lake before heading down to Provo, and dragging all my stuff from the car up to my new apartment. My new roommates, other than Kimberlee, were Beth Chon (from Baltimore) and Melissa Morgan (from the D.C. area). Ryan got accepted to Utah State, and we all had a night filled with card games and some sort of food and late-night television before he moved up to Logan.

SEPTEMBER. Again, I loved my classes: Rel C 351 (The Gospel & World Religions), Engl 364 (Literature of the American West), Phscs 100 (Fundamentals of Physics, not my favorite), Engl 293 (American Literature), and Engl 251 (Fundamentals of Interpretation & Criticism). Jennifer was living in DT, and we had a jolly good time getting to be friends. I started my dinner parties. Kim’s cousin Alicia’s friend Paul invited us to spend a weekend at his cabin; the colors of the trees in fall and the glory of the star-filled sky at night was absolutely breathtaking. Quentin, ah, remember Quentin? he lived about two blocks away, and Kim and I got to be great friends with him. Those random ice cream runs were the best. I also met Aubrey Ferrin, who had been a long-time friend of Sarah Nemelka; we were kindred spirits from the start.

OCTOBER. I started working for a woman named Ann Gonzales in Mapleton. She has twin daughters, Kay and Karen, who are 28 and have cerebral palsy. Since the time they were 12 she’s had “trainers” who work with the girls during the day: take them out to go bowling or see a movie, do activities at home, feed them lunch, etc. Ann needed someone in the evenings to feed the girls dinner so she could get other things done. I positively adored this job, as the girls were the sweetest I had ever known (though Karen could be a real pill), and Ann was wonderful. Aubrey and I went to Sarah’s wedding, which was gorgeously beautiful. I started having problems with my right ear. Towards the end of the month I got a letter from Jarom in which he made somewhat clearer his feelings towards me, and I floated through the rest of October.

NOVEMBER. More ear trouble, which escalated until I ended up in the emergency room early one morning. With the stress of health and school combined I felt overwhelmed; I made the decision mid-month to withdraw from my classes and come home at the end of the semester. Everyone was very supportive. Kimberlee came to Fairfield with me at Thanksgiving; we got to see Brian’s family, as well as Geoffrey and Garrett, who were visiting from Hawaii. Kim and I went to a movie with Quentin and then the three of us took a trip to San Francisco the next day. Quentin was our tour guide. I had mentioned to Kimberlee that I thought Quentin might be interested in her, and that sure started something!

DECEMBER. By the end of the week after Thanksgiving, Kim and Quentin were “an item.” I attended my first volleyball tournament when Ryan came to play at UVSC. Interesting stuff. The following weekend was a Ballet West performance of Nutcracker that I went to with Quentin, Kimberlee, and Daniel, who knew the Aten family because he’d served his mission in the Fairfield stake. Before the ballet we had a steak dinner, with asparagus and Egypt potatoes (ask me the story). The next day I hosted an open house, sort of a goodbye to Mika, at which there were approximately 100 dozen cookies, plus fudge, mints, and caramels (all homemade). It was good to see friends before I left. Back in California, I resumed my job at MHA, tried to get back on a normal sleeping schedule, and decided to write a book. Ryan and I made a deal that we’d both finish our books by my birthday next year (and he’d better keep his word!). Geoffrey’s family moved to California at the very end of 2004. Happy New Year’s!

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